Something for the Weakened

Writing’s on the wall/Ladder’s ’bout to fall

Monday, May 2nd, 2011 by Alastair

Couple of weeks back I was walking home – my bike was suffering from a bout of my repeatedly trying to fix a puncture, so foot based perambulations were the only option the mothballs in my wallet would really offer me until I bought a new inner tube. This general air of thriftiness only really stretched as far as public transport though. I had just done a spot of shopping and my rucksack was laden with groceries. As I ambled along a penny happened to catch my eye and the old rhyme sprang into my mind.

“Find a penny, pick it up and all day long you’ll have good luck.”

It was a warm, sunny early evening. There were people around on the street certainly, but not enough that I’d be blocking anyone’s passage if I paused to stoop. I briefly wondered how scummy the public would consider me if they saw me picking coppers up off the street, but quickly concluded that I actually didn’t care and quite fancied a bit of luck.

I arrived at the coin and bent forward to clasp it in my not so clammy hands. I just had it in my grasp when I was surprised by a loaf of bread lightly glancing the back of my head. The zip on my rucksack has been a bit dodgy for a few months now, so I always have to be careful when closing it. On this occasion I clearly hadn’t been.

Now I’m generally not a superstitious man, despite the events that occur in this story. Quite what possessed me to act upon the rhyme appearing in my mind I couldn’t begin to speculate, but it did appear to bring me some fortune. Yes , the loaf did clonk me in the back of my nut, but because of that I was able to grab it before it plummeted out of the bag onto the floor, presumably followed by the other foodstuffs I had been carrying. Had I not bent forward, I imagine that the zip would have gone at a later point during my journey when it was entirely behind me. The first I would have known of it would have been when my grub spilt itself out onto the path behind me.

As it was, I was able to save everything from making contact with the pavement, carefully carried my bag to a nearby bench, repacked it and carefully zipped it up in such a way as it did not open up of its own volition for the rest of my stroll.

No, I’m not a superstitious man. But I haven’t left the house without that penny since. And my bag hasn’t opened of its own accord since. Though that might be because I check it more carefully now. And don’t really buy individual Mojos anymore. But anyway, “How lucky is that?”*

*to be read in an unconvincing Scots or Irish accent – you choose

3 Responses to “Writing’s on the wall/Ladder’s ’bout to fall”

  1. Buzz Aldrin says:

    Buzz Aldrin always carries a lucky penny. Along with a lucky spade, ball of string, pocket knife, vacuum-packed dehydrated three-course meal, glucose tablets, case of bottled water, bandages, essential medicines, $1000 in cash, elephant gun, toothbrush, and three-man support team.

    Buzz has never been caught out. But he has a bad back.

  2. Cushing's Panther says:

    Did you go to the Moon?

  3. Buzz Aldrin says:

    Your goddamn right I’ve been to the moon, punk. I’m a bona fide piece of history, right here.

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